She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up�
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Randomize
