So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
Randomize
