between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
