you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
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