some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Randomize
