I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Randomize
