Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
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