Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
