I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
