ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
