I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
im holly from the hills drunk
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
Randomize
