party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
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