I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
Randomize
