im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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