Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize
