We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
Randomize
