I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
