addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
Randomize
