just come out here and I will go home with you...
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Randomize
