I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
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