Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Randomize
