Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
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