5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
