I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
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