He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
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