please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Randomize
