This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I am in a vortex of obligation.
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
Randomize
