You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize
