Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
