Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
I think im going to throw up on grandma
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Randomize
