small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
i used baking grease as lip gloss
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?�
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
