belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
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