I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Every concussion has its silver lining
Thank you for not boning my boss.
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
Randomize
