I hate your face
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
