I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Let's paint friendship bongs
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
Shame - the story of my life.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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