miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Randomize
