So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
