We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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