i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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