6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
