Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Randomize
