we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
