He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Randomize
