Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
