On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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