absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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