But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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