I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
Randomize
