i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
I FOUND THE LEGS
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
Randomize
