Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
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